14th year house bound

[Jacques]

Karen, i don't want to say what i would do, you are to precious to me, Karen are they saying you are going to be forcably commited or is it your choice?  Karen if it is your choice, it is yours alone, you have two beautiful girls and a whole life ahead of you, if they can help maybe it is worth a try.

it is a tough decision, can they promise proper care? can you get access to private faicilities with your private health cover? can you do out-patient care?

[hiddenite]

sorry Jacques I shouldn't have asked, it is my decision. Shaking so much anxiety awful

[hiddenite]

They are going to let me know if they will make me involuntary

[Jacques]

Oh Karen, i am sorry you are like this, you may need to try to distract, listen to music, go for a walk, do something with the girls.

Karen it will be a tough night, please don;t watch the show tonight, it will just make things worse for you, i am worried already, please promise me you will not watch it.

[hiddenite]

If they don't have a bed they will send me to the emergency department until there is a bed, that could be days.

My private health insurance won't cover me, pre existing condition

[Jacques]

Karen this is so unfair, you have private health cover, what is the point of it if you can't use it when you need it.  it makes me so angry, they are making huge profits,  aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh

Karen i wish their where something i could do, you have been doing so well lately, not great, but better, i don't understand.  i wish their where someone who would be abledto help you get better, once and for all.

[hiddenite]

The mental health unit is the same one as I have been in. They have told me that being there causes me to deteriorate because of the abusive and violent men. I was attacked twice by a patient there. I also passed out because I couldn't make the communal eating.

All they do is sedate you, that's not a solution.

Sorry Jacques I know this isn't your problem.

Are you going to watch the show tonite?

[hiddenite]

The private health insurance cost me nearly three thousand dollars, and it's no use to me.

No win win I can't do anything right

[hiddenite]

I can't do this again!

[Jacques]

Karen the private health cover is not your fault, it is just another example of insurance companies stealing money off people to give to share holders.

Karen if your treatment was that bad their, and they want you to go back to the same facility, if i had the choice and it would make me worse i would not go.

Karen please don't worry about talking to me about this, you can't keep all this bottled up inside you, i am here for you to talk to and vent, any time unconditionally.

Yes i am going to watch the show tonight, if you end up watching it and you get triggered, please speak to me, i am better prepared this time, last night caught me off guard. the man my age who was house bound last night, it was almost my exact situation, it scared the crap out of me.

Karen please if you need emergency help please call lifeline.

I am online here till late tonight, anytime you want to talk i will be here.  sorry for the delay just now, i had a shower and a shave.

Karen i am here to support you, i can't make your decisions but i wil lend a gentle shoulder to lean on.