Lived Experience Forum

[Johnti]

G'day

I just wanted to share my experience with others to show there is hope for recovery no matter how bad your mental illness may be.

Around two years ago at 27 I started to experience anxiety and delusional thoughts. I was a high functioning offshore oil rig worker holding down a job offshore and running my own company when not offshore. I had only ever suffered from mild anxiety in the past.

My symptoms became worse after at a party I took two ecstasy tablets. I woke up the day after taking the ecstasy suffering psychosis and suffering auditory and visual hallucinations.

After seeing numerous doctors and psychiatrists I was diagnosed bi polar and schizoaffective depending on which doctor I spoke to.

My hallucinations began to diminish with the medications. However I started getting thoughts of violence towards my self and others. I could not escape these terrible thoughts no matter what I tried. They made me very uneasy and anxious. I couldn't feel joy at all and I put on 20 kg of weight from all the medication. I was suicidal and thought of ending my life often.

I spent time in two different psych hospitals trying to free my mind from these thoughts and voices.

I was put on anti depressants, mood stabilisers and two different anti psychotic medications.

It took me around 1.5 years to get my medication right and find a psychiatrist I trusted who got my dosage just right.

Now two years after this all started I can feel joy again. I can feel excitement. Voices and violent intrusive thoughts do not control my day. I consider myself recovered 80% better than what I was and still improving. I have now dramatically reduced my prescription medication.

I would like to share what I think may have helped with my recovery............

Time- I believe over time with the help of my medication my brain or chemical imbalance has balanced out.

Family/friends/girlfriend- having support from all these people has helped so much. Reach out to people close to you if you need help. If they don't understand call someone like lifeline. I called them a few times.

A psychiatrist- who you trust/ can connect with. I went through multiple different doctors before I found a doctor that could help me. Online many doctors have reviews nowadays.

Sunshine- it just makes me feel good 🙂

Dog or pets- having a 4 legged friend adds joy, a reason to go for a walk, and routine.

Orthomolecular medicine- after reading the book by dr abram hoffer called "Orthomolecular medicine in the treatment of schizophrenia" I started vitamin therapy for around three months. I felt marginally better, and I'm not sure if this helped cure me or not but I thought I should add it as it could have helped my recovery. I also added high doses of glycine to my vitamin regime. After 3 months taking all those supplements became too much and I couldn't take them any more due to nausea. I am no longer taking high doses of vitamins.

Fish oil- my physciatrist recommends it so do many studies on brain health.

Slowly getting back into routine- start working again part time if you can't handle full time.

Hope- things can get better no matter how stuck and low you may feel with your mental illness. There are professionals who can help you, there are millions of other people going through a mental illness.

Hope this helped someone:) I'm off to bed, working early tomorrow 😄

[morningstar]

Hey Johnti, I wish there was a way of giving posts a gold star, you're so right.

I'm sure this will inspire and help a lot of people, and echoes some of my own experience (it was acid/speed that tripped me over, a long time ago). Just being able to feel normal and experience what joy or excitement feels like, is something everyone takes for granted, but it's so precious and so easily lost for some of us.... Have a good weekend 🙂

[kato]

Hi @Johnti 

Thankyou for sharing your expierence with us, i am just starting my journey as i am calling it into finding a balance for managing my illness, and i feel inspired  by what you have written, it is nice hearing someone on the "other side" of the journey that i am starting giving hope in a somewhat dark initial stage,

I have been knocked down a few times already and i struggle each time to get my footing to get the motivation to continue, it seems like what i have ahead of me if it is anything like yours will be an interesting journey but one with a hopeful outcome.

Thank you again for sharing

[Johnti]

Hey @morningstar

Thanks for that, yep I used to take feeling normal for granted now I feel somewhat enlightened by going through such a hard experience with my mental health 🙂

Cheers,

Johnti

[Johnti]

Hey @kato

I'm stoked that my experience can make you feel inspired, going through a mental illness can be such a dark and lonley experience. I think this forum could defiantly give some insight to what path may work for you.

If you want to know anything about how I have made a recovery please ask I would love to help 🙂

Cheers,

Johnti

[Hobbit]

Hi @Johnti ,

I just read your first post, and I thought I would really like to send you a quick note to say how wonderful your message of hope is. Thank you so much for coming onto these forums and expressing yourself in such a positive manner.

I think messages like yours can really help a lot of people out there. Thanks again!!

Hobbit.

[CherryBomb]

@Johnti ,

You're story is (as many other have said) inspirational. I'm wondering if you could tell me what you did to get through your lowest of times? You mentioned that you had thoughts of ending your life. To hear that you've worked through those tough times to not only survive but thrive is great! 

I understand that there are a few members on this forums who often confront similar demons (or dragons for some), so it'd be great to hear what you found particularly helpful during those times. 

Thanks again for sharing you're story. It makes me smile. 

[Johnti]

Hey @CherryBomb

Thanks I'm glad my story makes you smile. 😇
Thinking back to my lowest times, i would do anything to distract myself from destructive thinking.

Reading a book

watching a movie

meditating/ being in nature a park or the beach

take my dog for a walk

exercise

Making healthy food

write a to do list of my daily and weekly goals

Doing things I enjoy, hobbies/past times

Catching up with friends or family when I was upto it

Working part time then eventually full time when I got better

Reminding myself that I can get better no matter how bad I may feel.

I hope this helps 😀

Johnti