Lived Experience Forum

[Faith-and-Hope]

I can so relate to what you are going through @MoonGal, with differences in the script .....

I lost my Mum over the corse of a year or so, to systemic scleroderma.  That thing masqueraded as a ongoing drama of minor ailments and illness that had us all, including the specialists, wondering what was going on.  We didn't realise we were losing her at first ..... but it became apparent that these ongoing waves of illness were draining her of strength and ability, and she was going under by degrees ..... so hard to even revisit it, and yet it is part of the healing to think back over it and come to terms with things in increments.

We had just moved overseas, so it was agonising being away ftom her in her time of need, and yet it resulted in the surprise gift of being able to be right by her side for her last two months, which would not have been at all possible if w e had been based in Australia at the time with the school terms as they are here.  We ended up back here on the European Summer school break - my kids would still have been spread across four different schools if we had been here .....

My Mum was in a country region, and it meant we could go to be with her.  And she was in hospital, so I wasn't responsible for managing my kids and her immediate care.

Stay strong @MoonGal.  There is still quite a road ahead of you, but you are doing great !!

❤️💗💜

[MoonGal]

@BlueBay, thank you - the 'process' part of this, taking her clothes in and packing up the house etc, is partially done. It nearly did me in Thursday week ago when I had to pack up clothes (and put labels in everything that took SO much time) I ruined one of her white blouses with lace cos the iron was on hottest dry setting and as I put the label in... It caught the lace and it all melted. OH no. I didn;t tell her though. I know so many of us go through this, everyone really still connected with aged parents, at some stage has to do the house divestment etc. Thanks for your support, this thread has been an absolute lifesaver for me. truly.

[MoonGal]

@Faith-and-Hope, ahhh, you have been through the hardest time with your Mum too. Love to you. It is amazing how some things work out re the European Summer holidays and time to be with her uninterrupted. Glad for you that you could.

[Appleblossom]

For my mum

"Oh Mum"

I hesitated at her door

Gently the words escaped from me

This was our final scene

her widowed huge man-sized hand

lay weightless:

thumb. fingers softly shrunken, cradled in mine

Silent and staring

I could not be sure

She knew I was there.

Hi @MoonGal thinking of you too.

[MoonGal]

@Appleblossom,  a beautiful moment of capturing the sadness and grief of end of life with your Mum. Made me cry. Thank you so much for sharing from your heart.