Ask Anything Monday!

[NikNik]

Hi all,

Find this week's question here

Struggling to ask a question on the forums? We find members are sometimes hesitant. Sometimes it’s because they feel a bit nervous, or perhaps they’re newer members and not sure where to start.

We want to give you the opportunity to ask us anything without facing these potential barriers on Ask Anything Monday.

This is how it works:

• Email your mental health related question to team@saneforums.org
• Every Monday the team at SANE Forums will collate the questions that come into our inbox and post them in this thread. We will not attach your name or username to the question. This means that no one will know who has asked what questions.
• Other moderators and members will answer the question for you throughout the week
• A new set of questions will be posted the following Monday.

Anyone can send us through a question anonymously, so please, don’t hold back!

Please keep an eye on the thread, even if you haven’t submitted a question, you may be able to provide support or advice for another member.

Nik

[kato]

Hi @NikNik 

I like the sounds of this, i think it might help a lot of people who might be struggling with how to ask something, or to even start a conversation here regarding what they are going through.

[kristin]

Hi @NikNik 

I agree with @kato - it's a terrific idea! I'll look forward to it 

Cheers, Kristin

[NikNik]

YAY!

Our first Ask Anything Monday!

We have recieved a question over the weekend, from a member who was a bit worried about posting this.

'I have started dating a really great person and I was wondering when the right time is to tell them about my mental illness. I have bipolar. I don't want make it a big deal, nor do I want it to change what they think about me. How long should wait (and how do I even tell them!)'

If you have experienced this yourself and/or have some wise words for this member, please post your response below and it will be visable by 5pm AEDT.

If you have a question you are apprehensive to post yourself, please email team@saneforums.org . If you get your question in before 10pm AEDT Monday, your question will be posted. If not, we just hold it until the next Monday 🙂

[Eagle]

'I have started dating a really great person and I was wondering when the right time is to tell them about my mental illness. I have bipolar. I don't want make it a big deal, nor do I want it to change what they think about me. How long should wait (and how do I even tell them!)'

Such a good question! It's really hard when you feel vulnerable! In my opinion there is no right period of time to wait.. it just depends how comfortable you feel and where the relationship is at. There have been people (friends, not potential partners) who I felt like right away I could tell them anything, and then other friends where it's taken me months to feel like I could tell them more personal things.

Tip: Don't just throw it into a random conversation 'How do you like your coffee? I have bipolar...' (slight exaggeration  ) but pick a moment of 'sharing'. Where there is an equal amount of vulnerability and sharing.

You sharing that you have bipolar is his/her privilege that you're sharing that information with them NOT something you should worry about being judged on

Hope that helps!

[CherryBomb]

Hi Everyone!

A reminder that Ask Anything Monday is tomorrow! So if you got a question that you're not sure about asking, we can do the asking for you.

Simply email team@saneforums, and we will post it up tomorrow for you. 

[NikNik]

ASK ANYTHING MONDAY!

Today we have 1 question & it's a good one!

I really want to open up to my psychologist, but every time I go into his office I almost break down in tears. The only thing that stops me from breaking down is to not talk! Not very useful when talking is the whole point of going there. I really want to tell him everything because I really want help, but I physically can't. Any advice or suggestions?

I think this is a situation that a lot of us have been in. So I hope we get many responses from the community.

Nik

[kato]

The best thing i have found, because i most certainly struggle with talking to my dr's,

I write in a book, write down everything i want to talk about, then i hand it to them at the start of the session..... once they read through it and ask a couple of questions i find it helps give them an indication of what is troubling me, or what i need to express, talk through etc....... And because it is what i want to talk about the words seem to come a little bit easier.

This only works for me as long as we stay on the subject of what i want to discuss tho.... but with time and with the dr's getting to know me better, talking has come easier.

I hope this maybe helps

Thank you

[coffeegirl]

I tend to agree with Kato, I write things down.

I make sure I include the date when I write my thoughts, so I can see when I have gone down hill (or up hill!)

Sometimes I don't feel like writing, but I just write a number, on a scale of 1-10 on how well or unwell I'm feeling.

I hope this helps!

[kristin]

I don't know that my reply will be what is looked for but: why not cry then? This should be welcome in a therapist's room. I teased my psych about the awful scratchy tissues she had and I brought my own (Kleenex Aloe Vera ones). I told her that her tissues had an implied message of "cry if you must" and my ones say "crying welcome here". You know she now buys the kleenex ones and I find it so much easier to cry.

When I'm really overwhelmed I bottle it up and then I'm too scared to let go. Crying is such a relief and release, it's a gift. Sometimes (like recently) I feel like if I start I will never be able to stop. But afterwards, even thought I feel very wrung out, I feel so relieved. Crying allows a release of the hurt and pain we are carrying. 

For years I felt like I had to be in control and rational in a psych's office, then I realised it was an invitation to be real - including crying. It's hard and scary, but very worthwhile. If they can't handle it then I guess you might need a new one. 

KInd regards, 

Kristin