corona corroding relationships

[Corny]

It's really hard meeting people that align with our values @wellwellwellnez . You are a deep thinker and sensitive.....not everyone is, and we get burnt. People come and go from our lives, but it hurts when relationships end, or don't live up to our expectations or hopes.

The abelism during the Covid pandemic has been absolutely painful & irritating, but not surprising....it makes me look and think of some people very differently. If you, or someone close to you, has never lost their health permanently, with no hope of cure, they can't understand our position.....apparently after the Spanish flu earlier in the century there was a 3 fold increase in Parkinson's disease, experts think it could be similar with Covid.....and also big increases in psychiatric illness.....some people have experienced psychosis for the first time in their lives. I am worried if my little nephew who is too young for vaccination got the virus, that it could be one variable too many to tip him into MI.....

The fact of the matter is, this so called 'lock down' is how people with chronic mental illness live every day. It's nothing new for us. 

You're the sort of person that has too much integrity and courage of conviction to fake it, and hang out with people that don't share the same values as you - a lonely life, but an honest & admirable one. There's a lot of pretenders our there that are happy to live half lives, and be a phoney, dodge them if you can,  Corny 

[wellwellwellnez]

@Lauralouas someone who has been reflecting a lot on trust, I feel so much for you.

[wellwellwellnez]

Very spot on with the lockdown mindset observation @Corny . I had already lost a lot of freedoms due to my mental condition by the time covid came along. It's sometimes an ironic advantage.

[wellwellwellnez]

@Corny @HenryX @Lauralou @Sophia1 @Adge @frog 

Had a house meeting. It took some effort but I think we eventually came to a mutually beneficial understanding. It was a combined mental health safety and covid health safety meeting. Feels like a lot more work than it should of been.

Considering where I was a few days ago, I was a bit surprised in my ability to slow feed my energy. Instead of panic, I found a fair degree of compassionate persistence. Pretty good for me at least. Everyone's input has been immensely usefull to this outcome.

I think through this recent process we've learned a lot about each others blind-spots and limitations.

[Adge]

Very well said @Corny Your Reflection was Spot On.

I am a Deep Thinker & am Sensitive also.

I have been attacked & taken advantage of for both - Especially by those who realised.

An Achilles Heel for their Advantage.

I am also highly Intellectual - Yet very Few on Words - Very Brief & Straight to the Point.

So I am often treated as Ignorant & Stupid - by those who use many words.

I know All the Big Words & I Know What they Mean (Well most of them) - I just choose Not to Use them....

Simply because most people don't relate to those terms.

Adge

[HenryX]

Hello @wellwellwellnez 

Pleased to know that the house meeting went well.

You also sound as though there was a considerable sense of personal accomplishment derived from the meeting process.

Sounds great

Best Wishes

@HenryX 

[Corny]

I share-housed and had flat mates for 20 years @wellwellwellnez , it can be awesome or it can be disastrous.....communication does really help, but if a person is inherently self focused and selfish that makes it close to impossible for them to be considerate of others. I am glad to read that the house meeting went well and no one stormed off or wasn't receptive to varying opinions. 

There's nothing wrong with being a dark horse @Adge , quiet people are often assumed to be uneducated or stupid, but as you say boisterous and out going personality types have to have the attention of those around them and command the room. But a dark horse observes and applies knowledge to situations those people don't know they have, it can come in handy @Adge and has boosted my confidence......local gossip can be demystified....some local gossip has been very very personally satisfying for Corn-dog, no one gets past me @Adge , they can try, but they will fail every time 

[Sophia1]

Hello @wellwellwellnez @Adge @HenryX @Corny @Lauralou 

This response has many issues which might trigger some people.

If you have been involved in war or lost precious people as a result of wars or illness the following could be triggering.

Please consider this carefully before reading.

You might need to set some personal boundaries in order to take care of your own health.

These times are very different to any that I have experienced before.

I have grown up in a world where innoculations at certain ages have warded off some very serious illnesses that have taken many lives in the years prior to my arriving on this planet.

Thank goodness the health systems fought for that right. They saved lives and helped shape survival of our families.

They gave us an opportunity for life.

The world has also changed within the last 3 decades or so to  become more and more materialistic.

People are judged by many; by their appearances; how youthful they look with the help of medical intervention.

Cars are replaced for newer models within 3 years in many cases.

House renovating no longer consists of repainting; replacing some window furnishings; carpet.

These days new furniture updated to the latest trends; televisions in every room. Updated computers; smart phones; fitness watches.

The list is endless.

Families rarely spend their after dinner time all together in one room.

Many disappear into their bedrooms to watch their own  television; a size larger than their window.

I have witnessed others checking their phones and sending text messages whilst whilst dining out supposedly together. 

I have heard some people say that they no longer sit at a table to share meal times together.

The dining room table is used when guests come. In some cases not even then.

This is not my life; it is of some of those within extended families. It is what I have heard spoken about amongst others.

We have merged into a world of great egos.

When the virus overtook most countries the initial shock was around not being able to attend their personal activities.

Shopping was no longer an option. Social outings restricted.

I heard so many  conversations within our country  about individual egos.  Nothing changed. The penny did not drop.The virus was not here in this country.

Fast forward lockdowns.

Conversations around those who had family affected.

Fast forward delta strain.

Conversations about further lockdowns and restrictions.

No mention of those still in lockdown overseas.

Fast forward delta strain outbreak in this country.

Protests and marches;  rights taken away from them.

Violence.

Further spreading of virus.

No accountability.

Business owners in uproar about having to close for a week. 

Not one thought of all of the businesses; families; individuals overseas during this whole time having no choice but to learn to live with the virus.

Not one thought of countless losses of life.

Thousands and thousands of people who have lost family members; close friends;neighbours.

Imagine the intensity of grief and loss.

I have lost several friends over the last couple of years to the extent that my existing trauma just accumulated; no time to gradually dissipate;work through the grief.

How are those people overseas?

What have I realised?

Even with world catastrophes, self centred, egotistical people are the ones who complain the most. They are mostly the people who ignore restrictions, lock downs, complain about their circumstances.

The ones who are experiencing symptoms of mental illness for the first time are more than likely those who have some compassion for others. 

I hope that they might stop and think now about all of us who have lived with mental illness and hidden our struggles to attempt to fit into yes that is right a selfish society.

Am I ok on one day a year? What about the other 364 days of the year?

Might you actually ask me this question just off the cuff? Might you think about me at random?

I ask how someone is if I feel that they are more subdued not because I think that they have mental health? I am concerned that they are alright. This is not rocket science to me.

My anxiety levels have been at an all time high on many occasions since the covid updates have multiplied.

The number of websites; news updates have multiplied just like the virus has.

It is a minefield to work out what is going on where. Who is in lockdown now? Which borders are closed? 

Which are closed to only some states?

The list goes on.

I am told that I must focus on my own life and not worry about others.

My self isolating which has been on and off for a large part of my life has returned.

I work very hard at this. This does not just improve because someone has told me to focus on myself.

It is within my makeup to feel concern for humanity.

Whilst I am affected and concerned for what is happening within our world; 

there are people who are supposed to be self quarantining therefore not allowed outside; blatantly ignoring the rules.

Why? How can they not think of how this insidious virus spreads? 

Fined $5000 each.

Will that $25,000; I believe that there were 5 people choosing to eat out together all meant to be self quarantining.

Will that $25000 cover the cost of one person being hospitalised for 1-2 weeks.  Hospitalisations.

Cover the cost of a funeral? funerals?

Cover the loss and grief of a loved one of others due to their selfishness.

This is from just one case scenario.

How is this world going to survive a war?

How would these selfish idiots have survived previous wars?

Are they aware of what is going on in Afghanistan now?

Are they aware of the latest disaster of nature in New Orleans?

Are they aware of the increase in disasters of nature over recent years?

Would they have survived world war 2? Loss of lives.

Loss of jobs. Loss of income Loss of food.

Rations.

No they would not. 

Where would we be? We would not be here? They would have destroyed life in all of those countries involved in  that war.

Keep going back with the same theory.

No world at all.

How can people who have compassion and empathy continue to carry the aftermath of those self-centred; egotistical;selfish people?

I am angry..very angry..

I have had enough of these people..

I  choose to live my life with people who are humanitarian..

I will choose to spend time with less people. Only those who have compassion.

I imagine you wish that I was not tagged now.

Sophia

[Appleblossom]

@wellwellwellnez I followed this thread with interest and waited a while to reply.  I am glad your posting about it, helped your mindset in managing your house conversations.  That is a big win.

Last year the main person I had good rapport with was my physio who was Indian, so I felt compelled to research and be uptodate about the Covid circumstances in her country of origin, especially as it was more severe than here.  Partly it was because I appreciated and was surprised by her diligence, and partly cos I am innately curious about the world and we do have ac cess to the internet.  I was living alone.  I was really glad we had long and ongoing discussions throught the lens of scientific literacy, but also talked about feelings and social links etc.

I am struggling a little trying to bridge peoople of differing beliefs and mindsets about the virus.  Feeling stretched, but do not want to say a lot. It has been polarising for many and the media encouraging dobbing and turning neighbours agin each other over the issues seems very sad and un-Australian to me.  What is the nature of the good and moral thing to do ...??  It is sad and I am feeling stretched.  Good thread Bella.

Apple

[wellwellwellnez]

I've really got to echoe you there. I've been polarizing but wherever you are on the poles its all the same problem. Feels like the governments and companies etc who actually deserve to make serious accomodations have once again avoided accountability by splitting those who would hold them accountable.